I'll always be there

So outing with the cuzzies was fun fun fun! been so long since i met iza and ika. gosh. they're misssed. so yes. got to meet them just now, lyk finally. after a month of not seeing each other i guess. the yousop's are forever late. so yes. meet them ard 6.50? i got no appetite. did'nt finish my food.

when to vivo after that. sat at the roof garden? yea. then we chilled, tell jokes. hahaha. im always the last to understand the jokes. gah! im super slow. gosh. took tonnes of pics there. Abg as was camera shy. He was running away from the camera. hahaha.

I feel so depressed being the shortest among my cuzzies. Ika, who is sec 3 is like way taller then me okay. how depressing is that. iza, 1 year younger then me is also taller then me. in fact, every of my cuzzies are way taller then me lah! ergh. It makes me feel like a kid. :(

Outing with them was definitely fun. We should do this again sumtyms. :)

So tmr, might be meeting anna, azimah and hazi to catch things up. after, 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 month of not meeting each other. hahahha. i miss them a lot!

I give you my heart on a string. i just don't want to miss anything.

It kept me wondering, when ur heart beats so fast, what does that actually mean?
Could it be that, one is scared?
But what if it beats so fast but theres actually no reason to be scared of?
or is it something bad is going to happen?
or otherwise?

I think my phone is on a verge of it's dying days. Now, i can't press 0 7 and 9. i can't take pictures either. lights for keypad aint working anymore. sigh~ shitty shitty day. My body feel so hot this few days. lacking of sleep? maybe. Went back home, really exhausted. luckily by the time i got home, i get to eat. Mood was pretty much shitty today. after eating, went to bed and im off to lala land.

I think my friends realise the sudden mood of change after sitting at mc d's. sorrrrry ye. *kiss*

My PP supervisor called me recently, he was asking about my PP, and i went like "err, i have'nt start yet" Gosh. i seriously need to start on this freaking thing. But the problem now is, how? how should i even start?! =(

I got a design to do too. but who shall i work for? style ig or eva? should i even do this thing when i got PP to finish up with. But i get paid for eva tho. sheeeeesh.

Class was pretty much shitty today. But i made new friends. I understand how aqila feels. But, im seriously use to this kind of environment. seriously. Yr 1 sem 2 was a bitch. But i manage to pull it off. Being in this class now with aqila, i shall say, thank god. Luckily she's there to make me talk and make me smile sumhow. Playing psp games with her was the best, noisy!! though i keep winning her *ehheemmm*, i gave her a chance today ye aqila ;P

So tommorow, heading out to break fast with the beloved cuzzies at vivo. Which in fact, is the first time we're gonna do this cuzzies gathering thing tho there's only the 7 of us. ahhaha.

sometimes, reading random people blogs makes me soo jealous and sad too.
im tired. not really tired "tired". the "tired of my life" kindda thing.
"tired" of everything kindda thing.
i feel so shitty. sick. useless. hopeless.

i feel that, i've hurt so many people in my life.
and for that, i hate myself.
i am sorry.

Cuz, i can't fake. and i can't hate

So here i am. In vivo coffee bean. Trying to resist those temptations from eating when i see the rest eating. Yes, im the only malay here. Shitty but yea. Im strong enuff to bare this temptation. Skipped school today, first week of semester, but yea. Sorry aqila for not attending class, wanted u to follow, but u already reached class. sigh. I got my first A. lyk omg, that never happen to me before in my entire life of the first week of school. Im glad. haha.

Oh oh! on my way to school, the bus almost left me okay. well, partly, it was my fault for not realising that the bus reached. So yea, i only realise when it was reaching. so i got up when it was rite in front of me. and pitily enuff, the bus stop for me. 50m away from the bus stop.

So yest, my aunt came over. and i was definitely not one of her favourites. well, i can see it thru her eyes. sumtyms i hate being judge by people. And the worst thing was, my family and her family fought before. it's just too awkward now. maybe im daddy's little girl and that's y she hated me for. but i dun want to think too much abt it either. if u hate me, then so be it. Who cares about how clever your daughter could be. So dun brag about ur daughter to my parent. ok sheesh. i dun want to get into it. just a sneak preview would do.

Im hereeeeeeeeee waitingggggggggggggg.
waiting for time to pass by.
quick! 7! quick!
i want to eat!!!!!
='(

omg, my friends saw a shooting star.
How cool is that?! and and. i missed it?! daymnit. not my day seriously. sigh.
Sat by the bay. saw this bouy. and i asked loga. it goes sumthink like this lah. hahaha. and it cracks me up sumhow.

"loga, if sumone were to drown in the sea, can i jump into the sea and rescue the person with the buoy?"
"Minah, do you even know how to swim?"
"Nah i don't but i can jump with the buoy in the sea and save the person wat. But wait, what if i jump into the sea, then the buoy went other ways, while i went in the sea without the buoy on my hips sia? i'll drown sia!"
"WOMEN!! U CAN'T EVEN SWIM! DUN EVEN THINK OF GETTING INTO THE SEA. what's the point of the rope, you can just throw that bouy down the sea, and let the person grab it orsumthink right and u don't have to jump with the bouy instead right!!"

hahahha. why did'nt i even think of it anyways. I think, i love choosing choices the harder way without knowing that theres actually an easier way out. and that shows, i do things without thinking at times.

I actually wonder, if i drown, will i survive? or will i die?
hahaha. kay, i can't swim for nuts. 10 seconds, i fall into the sea, i might swallow the salty water. then i might choked. and i can't swim. i'll definitely drown. will there be any time for someone to rescue me orsumthink? hmmm. i'll try it out sumday kay? ahhahahhahah!

im not sure, was it right ot was it wrong?

hot hot heat

ryan guettler, is HOT!! gah. i still regret i did'nt manage to take a picture with him. sigh!



and ok, how cool is this. I want to meet them again!! :(